New freedom is weird.
There was something protective about desperation. In recovering from this. Get ready to become friends with desperation. You and desperation are gonna be cellmates for the next year or so. “But that sounds like a nightmare. ”
There is an upside to it tho.
“Yeah what’s that?”
You finally have to face yourself.
All those things you been doing to run from all those things. That’s done now. Or if it’s not. You’re done now. That’s the choice you come up against in this echo maze.
It’s rough. It’s a bad wake up call. You wake up to the fact that you yourself laid waste to your life. You don’t have to face that all at once but you will over time. Your delusion still operates so it feeds you the very bad news in stages. According to your ability to handle the news. And I suppose that who and where you are in your life will determine how you react. How the every action /equal opposite reaction dial is set on you. Most , simply just move on and keep their torment private or speak along shadowy networks about it. Shadowy not in terms of dark spirit. Shadowy in terms of keeping anonymity safe guarded. There is much fear still operating even in the zones of recovery for this disorder. Many are brave but many more are not. And for good reason. They’ve been destroyed by a predator. And almost always more than one. There is a kind of instinct to hide when something like this happens to you. I’ve been hiding for a year. Subconsciously I’ve been hiding forever. But consciously I’ve been hiding for a year. There’s a big difference. A year was all I could muster in the hiding department. It was weird going thru total alienation with my whole family after being discarded by a psychopath and nearly dead without really being able to communicate with anyone what I was going thru. I don’t think that’s at all rare. It’s too complicated a story to tell and too complicated to be believed in normal terms in 2016. Now 2017 it’s much easier for people to grasp. In 2018 it needs to be common knowledge. By 2019 we need to have laws in place and system set up to make these predators of crimes like these. Mind crimes. Soul crimes. True crimes. face the consequences of their actions. And we need to have facilities set up specifically to help victims who are just waking up.
When you come too. Chances are there are more than one of these types in your midst. In fact if you wake up to this late. Mid forties for instance (not rare. About right. People wake up all different times tho) well by then you have probably kicked many of the good people in your life to the curb. Not all of them of course. I’m just making the point that very likely (it stands to reason) you’ve drawn more than one in.
(and I’m gonna disgust you on purpose)
I was like a pig with a bunch of toxic nipples being sucked on by toxic cripples. ) sorry. I couldn’t resist.
I had and still have many good friends as well but being victimized to this degree means you’re gonna isolate and heal the way a wounded animal does in the wild. You can’t really face anyone for awhile. And this plays into their hand. If your situation is in the family they will likely ostracize you as my family did me.
You will find some that you can communicate this too and be understood by. But they can’t give you all you need in this part of your journey. They just can’t.
Really at the beginning of this we should build institutions specifically designed to help people just coming to terms with this. It’s cruel how the world is currently set up for it. We need to open more awareness of this. And give people many different options on their healing journey. One shouldn’t feel half insane about exposing the truth and calling out the assailants of an attack on the soul such as this. It’s too deep a cut to go unpunished. It doesn’t make sense that it would. It makes normal crime seem ridiculous in comparison and yet it goes unpunished? Why?
Could it be that that behavior is actively being rewarded? And pushed into us more and more all the time? What would be the upside of having people disassociate from their spirit and become more and more fear based? People are easy to control when they’re afraid. Not so easy when they’re not.
People by stuff and need stuff when they’re afraid. Not as much when they’re not.
That’s why it’s so easy to see this in terms of a spiritual war because it so obviously is. Something about being victimized by a psychopath is very enlightening. It teaches you all kinds of things actually. But the thing that resonated most with me is just how totally dark it was. That’s the part which shocked the fuck out of me. It was absolutely black dark black dark. It was totally cold. And totally over the top in displaying its aggressively violent intent. Yup pretty much. No not pretty much.
Totally dark as fuck. And then even darker than that.
That leads you to the spirit war bit. Because it’s a force that can only be described as inhuman. It’s inhuman.
And personally I woke up right on top of TRUMP USA
Who was himself gaslighting a nation constantly fragmenting a nation constantly. Pathologically lying all while charming the pants off everybody. Including the haters who tho genuinely hated him. Loved to hate him too much. Me included.
It can seem. It did seem. To me anyway. That the problem of our age took root from NPD and all the pathologies on that particular scale. Sociopaths. Psychopaths. The ones who know better but have no empathy so hurt people for fun. Not from a disorder of their mind. They are not insane. But a disorder of their personality. Hence it’s a conscious choice. Hence it is evil. Hence. They are evil.