I feel like this blog is a manifestation of the narcs in my life fear more than of my own vision. The way fear when focused on and acted upon will bring the feared result. The narcs in my life pushed me to a point where my survival became hinged on this expression. In energetic terms you could say they urged me to do this thru malignant motivation. You could also say that perhaps on some level knowing that they only had access and power in the realms of destruction so that they decided they should sacrifice themselves by making it plain to me what they are and what they represent to the expression of my life. You could almost say that. But you would be very mistaken indeed. However the end result is the same. Their dismantling of your existence has lead you here. To the precipice of self discovery. You hadn’t imagined the carnage that lay before you. You didn’t bargain that your own family meant you no good at all. That part still doesn’t sit well. Perhaps it never will. Should things like that ever sit well? Perhaps not. But things like that don’t need to sit well when you set your sights on redemption. Where as revenge is not possible. Redemption is probable. Where as revenge will drive you down. Redemption will bring you up. Where as revenge keeps you in their toxic grasp. Redemption helps you transcend all. Where as revenge is you staring at an empty wall. Redemption lets you hear the call. Where as revenge still keeps them in your mind. Redemption allows the light to find. Where as revenge will keep you trapped and blind. Redemption gives time you can rewind.
Redemption is probable so long as you go no contact. Impossible without that. They’re venom is exact subtle and strong. All the awareness in the world can’t really protect you. Not now any way and not for a long time. There is no revenge like redemption and for the redeemed no need for revenge at all. Just love and mercy and the ability to dream and see it thru. Which the narcs have taught you to be grateful for. You could say they are great teachers. But not how their fragile self concept would have them be. Rather they are teachers of how not to be. Light only exists in relation to darkness. You wouldn’t know how precious your gifts are without realizing just how voided so many who go thru the stations of this life actually are. There is no revenge for those who have no light which serve frames for you to see your own. It’s all about redemption baby.