You were their project. They weren’t artists.
They were working stiffs.
They did enough to survive and no more.
They had no vision or dreams.
They were carbon cut outs.
They emulated humanity in a nuclear family lost somewhere in the suburbs.
And on the surface, beyond survival basics, they had no creativity to speak of.
No evidence of any real project.
And yet, looking at it another way, and with different eyes, I can see that’s not true at all.
They were very creative and worked diligently on their project. And what was the main thing they were building?
The perfect scapegoat.
To build a scapegoat takes careful planning and tried and true systems of attack which make the scapegoat defenseless and blind.
From there they systematically fracture the scapegoats will to live and attempt to demolish any chance at fullfuing his life at all.
They have to be ruthless and view their victim as beneath them and they have to reinforce and maintain this balance thru out the course of the relationship.
When the scapegoat, or I should say, if the scapegoat wakes up, they will unfortunately discover they were never loved at all but rather actively cut down and despised.
The dumping grounds for the shame of others, sending you out into the world clueless and blind with the idea that love is a form of emotional and mental torture. A sonar going off straight into the hyper sensitive antenna of every predator you come across.
This of course makes sense, as obviously you were of little value to them outside of a trashcan for shame.
That’s the dark reality.
You were there project.
You were groomed.
They took away your human rights and abused you night after night.
You had no choice but to internalize the horrendous amounts of shame being loaded in your direction.
Your very survival depended on taking that shame in.
You had no choice.
You were a child and you were given no choice and before that, you were profoundly sabatoged into believing you deserved no choice.
That is the truth of what happened to you.
And it is what keeps being reinforced from these types forever until you implement No Contact.
You are their project.
You have always been their project.
Don’t confuse that with “mattering” to them. You don’t. No more than a decent trash can matters to them.
Even the things you thought you discovered on your own.
A bad kid.
You were set up.
It all was a set up. Born into a toxic field of the predator kind. It’s a wonder you survived. You continue to surprise.
You were their project.
They don’t lack creativity. They just use it differently than you.
Theirs is dedicated to the darkness.
Theirs is dedicated to setting traps and springing them.
To victimizing and shaming.
To breaking people and ruining their chance of showing how it is possible to live in the light and get and give tremendously.
This they cannot have.
And they cannot have that,
because they cannot have that, and if they cannot have that than no one can have that.
Especially not their little project.
Especially not you.
They are dedicated to making sure that never happens.
They are actively dedicated to it.
You need to know what kind of war you are in and that primary defense of this against these predators is No Contact.
The only defense is no contact and if you don’t think they toxic shame dump on you with even the slightest contact than you don’t know your enemy.
You are their project. Not their family member. Not their friend. Not their lover. You are their project. And in their world their project is deemed a masterpiece when it finally takes its own life.